new janes
“You could use some new Janes,” Someone called. I turned my head to meet the voice and our eyes met. I stopped walking and stood there a few feet in front of his table.
Elsa and I were arm and arm. She looked over, snorted, and dropped my left arm.
“Good luck,” she said and continued walking towards our group gathered at the far side of the club. I followed her with my eyes for a moment, feeling abandoned. Then I shifted my attention back to the table.
“I like these heels. They’re perfectly fine heels.”
He looked absently over my shoulder at the stage I’d just come from.
“They distract from your performance,” He said plainly.
“I haven’t received any complaints,” I said. “About my performance.”
“No?” He asked.
“No.”
“Ah,” He looked away dismissively. “Well, now you have.”
He sucked at his cigar and picked up his whiskey drink and took a slow sip, having decided our conversation was over. There was a softness to his eyes which I’m not entirely convinced matched his semblance.
I surveyed his company, a ring of suited men slouching around the large wooden buffet, elbows casually resting on top, some crossed their arms. Two held cigars and watched the dancers up on stage. Not one of them acknowledged my presence. They all had drinks and a spread of cards sprawled across the round table. No one said a word.
“Well, gentleman,” I said, tipping my non-existent hat in their direction. “Enjoy the evening.” I eyed each one of them as I spoke, except for him.
Then I turned on my heel and walked smoothly and slowly back to where I’d come. Once backstage I threw my purse on the chair and cursed him because no one was there except Maria and who cares what Maria sees anyway.
She ran over and flooded me with questions about the performance because she was stuck backstage during our numbers. I looked down, considering my T-strap heels Aunt Alice had bought me four years ago when I first started at the Academy. The back of each heel was significantly lower than the front and there were scuff marks all up and down the sides. One of the toes was beginning to bore a small hole. I fingered the old satin on the top and steadied myself with the chair back as I removed each of them from my feet.
“What do you think about these?” I asked her, dangling the shoes in front of Maria.
“Oh, they're fantastic!” She gushed.
“Good. Take ‘em.” I handed them to her and dug my black wedges out from the bottom of my bag and shoved my feet into them. I walked over to the mirror and reapplied my matte red lipstick another time.
“You’re giving them to me?” Maria asked as she tried them on.
“Yep.” I smacked my lips together to spread the color around. “C’mon. Let's take a cigarette outside.” I grabbed her hand and we quickly walked past the row of bulbed vanities and through the thick black curtains, out the back through the door and to the street.